Alcohol. My escape mechanism for the majority of my adult life.
From the age of 18 to 28, I fell into depression due to my appearance and over the years it got very severe. Alcohol was my way of believing I could be accepted in this world... But it nearly caught up on me.
In my teenage years, I had an eye operation and they operated on the wrong eye. This would be become a lazy eye, and over time my eyes would be the thing that would make me drink. I’d drink to forget who I was. Suicidal thoughts crossed my mind and self-acceptance was not on my radar... Because I didn’t want to be here.
I turned to alcohol for 10 years… I showed up to work but had to fight through the day, I went into hiding from my friends as my depression deepened… It was all on me to try and fight this, every day was a fight to stay alive. It was the hardest 10 years of my life.
Alcohol, at the beginning, was nice. It gave me some confidence, but over time it really made things worse.
In the last 10 years, I’ve been on the road to getting my life back on track. I have found myself on a spiritual level, I had the operation to fix my eyes, and it was a success!
I've been challenging myself for the last two to three years to quit the booze and accept who I am, and to learn to love who I am on a deeper level. I’ve been alcohol free now for nearly five months. Booze really is poison… It makes it ten times worse when you are depressed, and it did nearly catch up on me.
The short-term fix (alcohol or drugs) to have a good time or gain confidence does not help you to be who you want to truly become. Alcohol free life for me is now living life on my terms and becoming the best version of myself possible.
I’m the happiest I’ve ever been and I love the tribe and community we have here at Over the Influence.
Well done and good luck to everyone on their alcohol free journey!